Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Hitting the Brick Wall.
So part of the reason that I undertook creating music as my senior project was because I generally failed to see anything through. I start a project with a lot of enthusiasm and energy, and as time goes on all that energy diminishes and my hopes of completing what it was I wanted to do dissolve. Eventually I stop altogether and whatever it was I was attempting to do joins all the other incomplete projects I started and never finished. The same is true of songs, before I started my project I had many song parts, and I tried to develop full songs, but with time the song was simply put away and was never looked at again. Well that’s sort of where I am with my project now. At first I was extremely energetic about my project, and now I feel like what I want to do simply isn’t going to happen and that my project will be a failure. I understood that I was undertaking a large project when I started, or at least I thought I did, but now we are a mere 3 months away from graduation and it feels like I still have nothing to show, no results or product that I can say “I did that” or that I can be proud of. Yes, I have learned a significant amount of basic music theory, but that still doesn’t feel like enough. I wanted to have recorded songs as a finished product, and that is still what I want, but I feel like with the amount of time I won’t be able to produce something I can be really proud of. It feels like I hit the brick wall, but regardless of that I will still struggle on to write and record my music.